Best Parts

Last night Wyatt and I had dinner with my best friend Jami and her son Riley.  It was one part celebration (she's been living with her mom for last 5 years...her mom moved out 2 weeks ago) and one part "we haven't seen each other in ages and need a mom night!"

By the end of the night we four were sitting outside in front of her fire pit agreeing that this was the best part of being a grown up.

We listened to our boys play, we talked about an endless list of stuff we needed to re-hash with each other, we made and devoured dinner.

All those years ago when Jami and I first met I had a hunch she was going to be one of those rare lifer friends.  I don't have to many of those, but she and I have been thick as thieves for 10 years now.

Part of being a mom, part of this amazing journey I'm on with Wyatt, is having friends.  And I'm so thankful we have wonderful people like Jami and Riley in our lives!

Riley performing his Sparkler Dance

Wyatt's first sparkler! (since he's been old enough to hold them on his one anyway)

Bobo Break-Up

The Bobo War has ended!

I am officially calling it over at this point.  A couple weeks ago we arrived home to see a box waiting for us by the front door...a box from Amazon!  Which could only mean the bobo reward had arrived.  While Wy played with the kids next door, I took the box inside, took his new toys out and displayed them on top of the television.

Prior to ordering these particular toys, I had pulled Wyatt into my lap in front of the computer and asked his opinion of them.  I also asked if he thought they were cool enough to give up a bobo for.  The answer was yes.

So when he came inside for dinner and I told him to look by the TV he was pretty excited.  Like any kid he loves to get new toys, but he also knew these were his "special toy" for giving up his bobo's.  We sat on the rug in front of the TV and I asked him if he remembered why he was getting a special toy; "bobo's to babies!"  I asked him if he was ready to give the bobo's to the babies who need them; "yeah, babies sad."  I asked him if he wanted to help me collect them from around the house; "yeah!"

We got a plastic baggie from the kitchen and went room to room looking for bobo's to give to the "sad babies", Wyatt spotted a couple that I missed even and happily tossed them into the bag with the others.  Once we had exhausted his bobo hiding places I took him back to the living room and sat on the rug again.  I handed him the baggie of bobo's and asked him if he was ready to give mommy those bobo's so he could have his "special toy"; "YES!"  I then reminded him that if he did give me the bag, the bobo's would be gone forever, but he would be helping make some babies very happy; still "YES!"

That night we made some masterful pieces of artwork with his new dino stamp set and talked about how his new doll (yes I gave my kid a doll, that's a story for another day) is named Johnny just like his friend John Mark at church.

The last 2 weeks have been rough though.

After posting a picture of Wyatt with his loot on Facebook, my babysitter commented the next morning that she was surprised I hadn't waited until the weekend to do this.  My response was that no one was sleeping at my house anyway so why wait?  She had already managed to mostly separate him from his bobo for afternoon naps and I knew the worst of it would happen overnight when he was with me, so I didn't see any point in delaying.

There was a lot of crying the first few days especially.  And there was the time he found a bobo under my bed.  And the time he decided to try out thumb sucking to see if that would be a good substitute.  And the constant begging.  But through it all, he seemed to really cling to the idea that he had helped make some sad babies happy by giving them his bobo's.

*ASIDE*  No babies have actually received his bobo's...I know I'm terrible.  I hid the baggie in the garage because I was really scared to let them go in case things got horribly bad without them.  Clearly I am just as attached to them as he is.  I do plan to throw them in the dish washer for a quick disinfecting and then seeing where I might be able to drop the one's that are still in good condition.  I have no doubt that there is a mom out there some place that can't afford to spend the $5 to get her kid a pacifier who would be grateful for some gently used, but greatly loved ones.  *END ASIDE*

Wyatt still talks about all the babies he helped by giving up his bobo.  His little face lights up like sunshine when he tells you about how there were some very sad babies out there cause they had no bobo's and that he made them happy by giving them his.  My heart leaps to see how much my kid loves helping others, how he delights in using what we have been blessed with to help someone who is struggling.

There are no more desperate pleas for bobo; if Wyatt does slip and ask for it I simply tell him no and ask him what we did with those bobo's.  He (almost) always begins to grin when he thinks about his valiant deed.  There are other times when he just pouts and snarls about helping those babies, but those are few and far between.  I'm so proud of my little boy for learning how to self soothe and feel secure without a pacifier.  He takes a friend (read stuffed animal/blanket) to bed with him every night, but part of the fun is standing in front of the closet and picking one out every night.  And he ends up in my bed pretty much every night still, but we will work on that one later.  At the moment I still enjoy waking up to his sweet little face in the morning.



Wyatt's "special toys"




I managed to get him to sit for just long enough to take a picture of him with his reward



Clinger Dilema

We are entering a new phase right now.  I've decided to fondly call this one

THE-SEVERE-SEPARATION-ANXIETY-THAT-WON'T-ALLOW-ANYONE-TO-SLEEP phase.

I'm beginning to lose my mind.

Recently I decided that I was tired of Wy's nighttime bff, Bobo (aka the pacifier).  Having heard from quite a few people that slowly getting rid of it tends to work best, I shifted from letting him have it any time he wanted to only allowing him to have it at nap and bed times.

And that's when the separation anxiety started.

The first week mornings were kind of hard because I would make him ditch bobo as soon as he got up and some days he was just feeling sleepy and crabby so would cry for bobo until we got to the sitters house where he was instantly fine most of the time.

The second week, it evolved into him not wanting me to drop him off, he would cling to my neck and if I did put him on the floor he would bounce up and down, arms stretched up at me, pleading "up up up up up up up!"

During all of this he was starting to get more clingy at bed time too.  It's not unusual for him to stand at his door and cry for a few minutes when I put him to bed.  He really is a kid that thinks he's going to miss something exciting if he goes to sleep when I want him to.  So he whines and cries and stalls, but always ends up closings his door and getting into bed.

At this point though, it's gotten so bad that the second I turn to leave the room he is jumping out of bed and running after me.  I put the baby gate up in his doorway last night so he couldn't follow me down the stairs and he stood and screamed for a good 15 minutes before laying down.

And then he got up 6 times during the night.  SIX!  He was in and out of my bed twice, cried for probably 15-20 minutes when I just ignored him and let him stay in his room, and basically just freaked out all night leaving both of us tired and grumpy this morning.

I'm praying that once his reward gets here we can ditch the bobo for good and start working on some better self soothing.  We have been talking for weeks now about what we are doing with his bobo's now that Wyatt is a big boy.  If you ask him where the bobo's are going he will tell you, "to babies!".  I decided that the best way to deal with it and teach him a good lesson at the same time is to "donate" his bobo's to babies who need them and are feeling sad because they don't have any.  He seems to feel good about being able to help some babies and he's very excited to get his "special toy" to reward him for being such a big boy.

Besides that though I'm at a complete loss for how to help my son feel safe and comfortable on his own lately.  He's always been such an independent kid, there are times when we are home together that he is just not interested in hanging out with him, he would rather play with his toys on his own.  Which doesn't surprise me, I'm very solitary at times, I really value my alone time, so it works for the both of us.

Any suggestions or tricks that I can try?  What has worked well for your kids?

Sweet Baby

Wyatt was so sweet this morning I had to write about it.

I got up early today so I could throw dinner into the slow cooker before we left the house for the day.  As was typical for him lately, Wyatt was snuggled in bed with me through half the night, so I tried to be extra careful not to wake him as I got up.  Any kid free time I can get when I have something specific to do and a limited amount of time to do it in is always helpful.

After about 10 minutes chopping chicken into chunks I heard little feet hit the floor.  Since I didn't hear him yelling for me I kept quiet.  It took a little bit but eventually my sweet little blondie padded into the kitchen holding his blanket and looking sleepy.

"What you doing mom?"

"Getting some food ready for dinner tonight"

"Oh.  Ok."

He then balled his blanket up, put it on the floor and laid down in the middle of the kitchen, watching me while I worked.

Finally everything was in the slow cooker and it was time to get dressed.  Wyatt made his typical appeal on why he didnt' want to put clothes on: "I be naked mom!  No want clothes on!"  He relented after I got out his Lightening McQueen hoodie. 

I went into my room to get dressed and brush my teeth while Wy played.  Which only lasted about 5 seconds.  Lately he seems to prefer watching me get ready in the morning rather than playing with his toys in his room.  He chased the cat around my room and then spotted the lip balm on my bedside table.  Normally we have an issue when it comes to "lip stuff"...he likes to taste it.  By which I mean he enjoys sticking the tube in his mouth and sucking on it to really get a good sample of the waxy unflavored stuff I prefer.  Not today!  I heard him say "I need lip stuff" and since my mouth was full of toothpaste at the time I wasn't able to tell him no.  But just like a big kid, he took the top off, smeared it on/around his mouth, put the top back on and set it gently back on the table.  It wasn't so much that my kid finally did it all on his own, it was that he looked so proud of himself that he followed the directions I had given him so many other mornings; "Put the top back on; just put it down, you don't need any more; get that out of your mouth, mommy is going to want to use that again some day!"

Wyatt asked for a ride down the stairs like he almost always does now that we have stairs.  Being 2 he tends to forget that when you wrap your little arms around mommy's neck so tight you cut off her air and she gets dizzy, which isn't too much fun while trying to carry a toddler down the stairs!  Not today!  He put his arms around me and then held his hands out saying "Don't choke mommy!" while laughing.

Once we got down stairs I realized I had left my cup of water up stairs (seriously I dream of the day that I get to the bottom of the stairs without realizing I forgot something and having to walk back up them) but as soon as the words, "Mommy forgot her water upstairs!" came out of my mouth, Wyatt ran to the stairs yelling "I get it!"

I followed him up, went looking in my room for it only to have him run in having found my water on his dresser.

"Here you go Mommy, I find your water!"

And again it was that beaming look of pride on his face that got me.

He was good as gold as we put on shoes and got in the car, asking so politely to play a game on my phone on the way to the sitter's house.

This morning completely made up for how horrible he was last night.

I Know This Much is True

More and more I am coming back to one central truth as a single mom of a little boy...

BOYS ARE WEIRD!

My son insists on reporting any and all bodily functions to me.

"Mom, I fart!"

"Wyatt burp"

"I peeped mom!"

"Uncle Chris burp!"

He laughs at things that aren't funny.

He really believes the cat wants to play with him, if only he could catch her first.

He is more dramatic than I ever thought a boy would be.

"Mom the sun hurts me!" (he wasn't even outside)

"Mom, I sick, I need go doctor" (he wasn't sick, didn't even have a sniffle)

"Ghost! Ghost in my room! I sleep in mommy's bed"

"Can't pick up, book too big" (it was a board book)

"Help me, help me!" (in reference to a multitude of things he doesn't want to do; put his cup on the table once he's done drinking, climb into a chair, take a bite of dinner...I could go on)

His favorite show (when I let him watch it) is Wipeout. There is nothing funnier to this kid than watching people fall down, get knocked down or have things thrown at them.

See for yourself.

Unintentional Swearing

Things my son has said that sound like swear words...

finger

frog

can't reach it

sheep

sit

oh man

And all from this sweet little face...

A Very Over Due Little Update

Per usual, life has gotten crazy and I have stopped blogging. I doubt anyone would be surprised if I took an official poll.

Since Wyatt's birthday a lot has gone one. We had a wonderful pirate themed party that Wyatt talked about for months afterwards (I till hear about it every once in a while). I think the biggest hit of the party was the temp tattoo's I got for the goodie bags; Wy is still working through the last of them, we just put a new one on his arm last night. ("Thank you mom for tattoo on!")

Thanksgiving was wonderful, Wyatt was the star of the show as always. My brother and I actually gave him an impromptu haircut that day...which is what happens when a busy single mom keeps putting off getting her kid a haircut and then realizes that since it's a holiday where extended family who are camera happy are going to be and panics a little bit. Thankfully Uncle Chris has clippers in his bathroom and was happy to give the little man a buzz. Wy always looks so grown-up after all his hair is gone! It was really fun to send him downstairs to see Poppa and Gamma (who had no idea what we were doing up in the bathroom) and watch their reaction to the new look.

Christmas was a ton of fun as well. My step brother Ben was able to come up for the weekend and spend the holiday with us. Wy loved his "Unca Been!" and seriously has not stopped talking about the "Five dollars!" Ben gave him. *Note: all paper money is $5 regardless of actual amount* We were also in the process of moving during the holiday which was challenging. Thankfully I was able to sign a lease early so I took the end of December and all of January to slowly move everything out of the apartment and into the new townhouse.

We love our new place, it's much bigger than our apartment was which is wonderful. Wyatt has some room to run around when the weather is bad and I don't go so crazy having a toddler running over me every 5 seconds when we are home. It's also nice to be so much closer to friends and family. I'm 15 min from my bff now, which means I have seen her 5 times in the last 4 weeks...about 200% more than when I lived in the apartment! Uncle Chris is able to come watch Wyatt while I am at small group every week as well since we are so close.

The church we have been attending since the summer has been such a blessing. I'm meeting some great new people and Wyatt loves getting to know some kids as well as meeting some dad's that can be fantastic male role models for him. It has been good to connect to my spiritual side in a very new way. Church was such a huge part of my life growing up, but not always in a positive way. Torch has been so refreshing and authentic.

Wyatt is doing amazing. He is growing like crazy and talking non stop lately. We have officially hit the "WHY?!?" stage, which drives me crazy but I know is important for him. He runs and jumps and throws and plays in new a different ways every day. The boy is quick! He's also fearless about jumping off of things and already throws like he should be a pitcher or QB some day. I really can't wait to get him into sports, I'm hoping to find something we can sign up for this summer on the weekends. His play has become very imagination fueled and hilarious to watch/listen to. Cars is a favorite movie and toy in our house as are dinosaurs. Though he can make a toy of almost anything these days!

Overall life is busy and crazy and wonderful! Mommy-hood keeps throwing new challenges at me, but it's still the best job I have ever had and I wouldn't trade it for anything. Wyatt is fantastic.

I'm sure there are a thousand things I am forgetting, but I suppose that's what I get for being so lazy and not blogging more often.

Oh and now that I have figured out how to post my videos properly expect more!!